What is Stress Eating? Understanding the Signs and How Emotional Eating Therapy Can Help
Feeling Stuck in a Cycle of Eating When You’re Stressed?
Do you reach for food when feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, or frustrated? Maybe you’re an at-work snacker constantly finding something to put in your mouth because the stress of the day is too much. Or maybe you find yourself mindlessly eating at social events to avoid awkward small talk. How about the finishing your kid's food type of eating or the snacking at night because the day was too exhausting to deal with type of eating?
Let me tell you, I have been there too—finding food to comfort or avoid the emotions I didn’t want to deal with. Because it’s easier to eat that box of cookies or bag of chips than it is to dive into what is really going on under the surface, right?! Food was my comfort. Food seemingly made everything better. I loved food and I looked forward to the dopamine hit I got from food because it numbed the chaos I felt inside. When I ate I didn’t have to focus on everything else in my life. Most of the time I didn't even realize I was stuffing my face until I was already done. All I knew was that food kept me afloat when I felt out of control, but I had no control over food.
If you can resonate, know you are not alone in this struggle! Many women turn to food when life feels stressful and overwhelming. Stress eating is a coping mechanism we pick up in childhood and carry with us into adulthood, often making us feel guilty and shameful for not having “more self-respect” or for not “being in control.” I want you to know, that if stress eating has gotten you through some hard times and keeps you from totally breaking down, then it is doing its coping job.
Coping mechanisms can be helpful in the moment, but ultimately do not help us heal the root of our struggles, our trauma. It is possible to heal your trauma and regulate your nervous system so you no longer feel driven to food when you are stressed out or overwhelmed. Let’s explore why so many women find themselves reaching for food under stress and then give you some helpful tips to break the cycle of stress eating, so you can develop a more peaceful, compassionate relationship with food.
What is Stress Eating?
Stress eating is a type of emotional eating that happens when we eat to deal with our emotions rather than physical hunger. Instead of nourishing the body, stress eating often becomes a quick way to soothe feelings like worry, sadness, loneliness, or frustration. For many women, especially those balancing work, family, and personal responsibilities, stress eating can feel like an easy solution to calm emotions. However, the relief is usually temporary, and the underlying emotions remain unaddressed.
Stress eating often increases when societal and cultural pressures add an extra layer of stress, making food a quick way to cope with overwhelming emotions. Juggling various roles and responsibilities, many women feel pressured to maintain a calm, collected exterior even when their inner world feels chaotic. This is why food often becomes a tool for managing emotions—food is accessible, socially acceptable, and can provide an immediate sense of comfort.
Signs of Stress Eating
Here are common indicators that stress eating might be affecting you:
You reach for food to soothe emotions rather than to satisfy actual hunger.
You tend to crave sugary, salty, or high-fat foods that provide a quick dopamine hit.
You eat even when you are full or satisfied.
You feel bad or judge yourself after eating.
You use food as a reward. For example: “I deserve some cookies after the day I had!”
You hide your eating habits from others.
You eat quickly, without really tasting the food.
Your eating habits change depending on what is going on in your life.
These signs don’t mean that you’re doing something wrong or that you lack control; rather, they point to a coping mechanism for stress and your emotions that might need a gentler approach.
Why Do We Stress Eat?
Stress eating goes beyond just eating too much or craving a snack. It’s about using food to cope with emotions that feel too overwhelming or difficult to face. Women especially may turn to stress eating as a way to manage or avoid challenging emotions. Below are some common reasons behind stress eating:
Avoidance of Emotions: When emotions feel too painful, food offers an easy way to numb or distract from them.
Unprocessed Trauma: Many women who struggle with past trauma may find that eating temporarily soothes difficult memories or anxieties tied to the past.
Relief from Perfectionism: High-achieving women or those who feel pressured to “hold it all together” may find it hard to release control. Stress eating can be a rare moment of escape, offering a break from self-imposed pressures.
Desire for Comfort: Stress eating often happens because we’re seeking comfort during high-stress times. Comfort foods give a quick but temporary sense of relief, even though they don’t resolve the underlying issue.
Women who are sensitive, perfectionistic, or who often put others first might be more prone to stress eating as a way to manage the intense pressures they face. But stress eating doesn’t heal the emotions themselves, and so the cycle repeats.
How to Break Free from the Cycle of Stress Eating
If you’re feeling stuck in a cycle of stress eating, there are gentle and effective ways to start finding freedom. Here are three steps you can take:
Gain Awareness
Awareness is the first step to change. Start by noting when you feel like stress eating. What emotions come up for you? Are you really hungry, or are you eating to manage something else? Taking a few minutes to journal your emotions or use a food diary can be incredibly helpful. Tracking when, what, and why you eat can give you powerful insight into your eating patterns.Notice Distress in the Body and Focus on your Breath
When you feel the urge to stress eat, pause and take a moment to check in with your body. What sensations do you feel? Do you feel tension, tightness, or discomfort? Where do you feel these sensations in your body? These are often physical signs of emotional distress. Then begin to focus on your breathing while avoiding judgment or trying to push the discomfort away. Instead, gently remind yourself that the discomfort will pass when it feels acknowledged and accepted. Tuning into the body and practicing deep breathing calms your nervous system and can reduce the impulse to eat.Practice Self-Compassion
Many women who struggle with stress eating are also hard on themselves, feeling ashamed or critical about their eating habits. Practicing self-compassion can be a powerful healing tool. Speak to yourself with kindness, as you would a friend. Remind yourself that it’s okay to struggle and that you’re taking steps to care for yourself. Self-compassion doesn’t mean letting go of responsibility; it means showing yourself grace and understanding.
How Emotional Eating Therapy Can Help
Emotional eating therapy can help you identify the events in your past that are tied to your stress eating and with modalities like EMDR therapy, you will find relief at the brain and body level. You will no longer feel the pull driving you to food when you’re stressed or overwhelmed. Emotional eating therapy will also help you reconnect your body’s natural hunger and fullness cues through intuitive eating practices. And lastly, you will develop more helpful tools to manage your stress and emotions so you no longer use food as a coping mechanism.
Sometimes, even our best efforts don’t feel like enough to overcome stress eating. Emotional eating therapy offers a supportive, non-judgmental space to explore what’s really behind your stress eating. As a trauma therapist, I can help you process your trauma, teach you to identify and manage your emotions, and help you develop a healthier relationship with food.
The goal of emotional eating therapy isn’t to restrict or control the food you eat—it’s to build a peaceful relationship with food, rooted in self-compassion and body awareness.
Find Support to Break the Cycle of Stress Eating
If stress eating has been a challenging pattern in your life, please know that support is available. You do not have to go at this alone, and you do not have to feel the shame that comes with not feeling “in control” of your eating. You have done the best that you can to cope with the circumstances you were given, and you deserve to find peace with yourself and food. I would be honored to support you on this journey. Consider reaching out for a free 15-minute consultation to see how emotional eating therapy can be a valuable step in your healing journey.
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Jarae Swanstrom is a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor practicing online throughout Idaho. She believes in a holistic approach to therapy, focusing on healing the whole body. Jarae helps women heal trauma, disordered eating, and negative body image. Learn more about Jarae or schedule a free consultation at mountainrivertherapy.com.
